Polite Fight
The other day I got off of the subway and there was a strange delay at the top of the stairs. Initially, a crowd got off the subway and descended down the stairs. But I could see a big gap of space in people in the middle of the stairs. I didn’t see how their interaction began but I saw two individuals talking to each other in an aggressive tone.
(Woman gestures to the man)
Woman: "No sir after you."
Man: "No no, I insist, go ahead."
Woman: "Oh after you, I insist, and watch your step."
*(What reads like a nice considerate response was actually a comment doled out with a tremendous amount of passive aggression.)*
Man: "No ma'am I think you should go first."
Eventually, someone went first, I don’t remember who. But they were not done interacting. The other person immediately followed at close range.
Woman: "Oh have a great day. I hope you have a lovely day."
Man: "Oh you too god bless you."
Woman: "God bless YOU."
They proceeded to follow each other closely going down the second set of stairs. I made a detour to make sure I was close by in case anything happened because it looks so tense and loaded. I also wanted to be close by because this was so entertaining.
*(Woman) "No no god bless you."*
There were more lines like this, I don’t remember them but they had a whole ass fight. I let my imagination go to a place where there had been a physical altercation, and a courtroom scene later on like in the movies.
*"No no, god bless you," said the defendant to which the plaintiff responded "No no god bless your mothers soul and your grandmothers soul and all your beautiful relatives may they be very blessed." At which point the defendant struck the plaintiff your honor as was captured here on cell phone footage obtained at the scene. Haha.*
But that gave me a good idea, have my fights and say aggressions in tone. Then the reporting of the incident is subject. "He was rude and his tone!" Well what did he say. … anyways.. the energy was fuck you and the words were Mister Rogers. Cool.
By the way, Mister Rogers is the coolest guy. If you don’t know how cool he is, I urge you to watch his speech to the U.S. Senate Commerce Committee, where he asked for funding related to his show. It's incredible; I've included it below. It's a masterclass in genuineness, decency, and—I can't even find the words to describe it—just an endearing, sweet, intelligent, heartwarming display of excellence by someone who's clearly talented, passionate, good-hearted, engaging, and important. Wow. Check it out... the whole thing is so beautiful, including the response he elicits from the person he's speaking to.