Farting in Yoga Class

Farting is  a component of yoga class that sometimes happens. It’s a lot of stretching and movement of stomach and other organs. This often  results in loud toots being heard. It is a very natural function and usually the holistic thinking cast of classes deals with it with the utmost maturity. Teachers sometimes immediately say “it’s very natural”. But usually this sentiment is felt without being addressed .

It’s never a big deal. One time however, it was a huge deal for me personally. It was quite early in my yoga career and I was in a very small class. The studio was tiny and there was probably between two and four other students. It was very intimate.

The teacher was this epically beautiful lady who I had a crush on. She was super graceful, stylish and was the first teacher I took yoga class with. It was amazing. She definitely saw potential in my consistency and rigor. This result in her regularly giving me adjustments to increase the depth of my stretching/ pose/ practice .

I used to love this as she would touch and alter my position. Obviously this was a very desired thing. However one time, When we were in malasana pose (squat pose , pictured below)

I let out a very silent but extremely deadly fart. This isn’t supposed  to gross you out , but quite simply , there was not a sound but it was treacherous. I could feel the teachers presence behind me. As much as I tried to repel bed  , I could tell her approach was inevitable. She came up behind me to adjust me. And upon a split second of physically adjusting me , she was attacked. Instantly, she was nowhere to be found having backed up quickly and instantly I was mortified but i was funny as hell.  

I went home and told my girlfriend who laughed hysterically because we both shared our crush  for this teacher. She absolutely loves the story. This was good.

I now know that bad food combining is largely responsible for gas. Whenever I’m gassy now it’s because I have broken the rules or food combining.

Malasana Pose.